


This is the last time

by Queenofthebees



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Bridget Jones Fusion, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Jon and the Starks Are Not Related, Jon and the Targaryens are not related, Jon is Mark Darcy, Jonsa endgame, Love Triangles, Theon is Daniel Cleaver, complete with Christmas jumper cameo, will never be able to recreate that glorious fight scene though...
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-05
Updated: 2018-02-05
Packaged: 2019-03-13 19:51:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13577772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queenofthebees/pseuds/Queenofthebees
Summary: She wrenched her mouth away with a desperate pant, her forehead pressed to his and she couldn't help but grin at him."Wait a minute," she murmured against his lips. "Nice boys don't kiss like that!"He smirked, moving his head so his breath caressed her ear, leaving her shivering in his arms."Wait until I kiss you somewhere else!"





	This is the last time

**Author's Note:**

> Finally started this  
> ("WHY GOD, WHY?? WE HAD A DEAL, LET THE OTHERS GET OVERRUN WITH WIPS, NOT ME!!!!")  
> Soooo anyway, yeah this is a Bridget Jones AU. And there will be some Theonsa smut, I will warn that in the chapters though so anyone not in for that can skip the scenes.  
> Also, I made modern Sansa a bit less into politics because, well she's had no reason to learn like in canon. Of course, to me it is always important to be into politics but for the sake of the story, that worked better.
> 
> Title from 'Born to Die' by Lana Del Rey

Sansa sighed as she switched off the ignition of her little blue mini. She leaned back in her seat, eyes rising up to take in the full view of her parent’s house.

She hadn’t been here in months. Her job was so demanding right now that she barely had time to even meet her friends for drinks let alone travel from London back home to Edinburgh. And of course, the end of yet another of her relationships was something she had wanted to avoid talking about.

Especially since Robb was married, Arya was engaged and Bran was moving in with his girlfriend of two years. Rickon was the only one of her siblings that was single but since he was only fifteen it barely made her feel better about her own failing love life.

With it being Christmas, however, it meant that she really had no choice but to come home.

Of course, she did love her family and missed them terribly. She just knew that, if her mother didn’t ask a million questions about what had happened this time, she would be actively trying to set Sansa up with the son of one of her friends.

Sansa had politely declined her mother’s matchmaking attempts. As much as Sansa loved her mother, Catelyn Stark did care a lot more about status than Sansa thought she should. Sansa admired the work big earning jobs such as lawyers and business managers did, but she found such things terribly dull and her mother always seemed to find the stereotypical toff-accented, snobby ones as well.

Taking another deep breath, she opened the car door, pulling her coat tighter around her as the winter winds hit her. She stepped up to the boot to drag her case out and decided to leave the Christmas presents for later.

Her father was the first one to greet her as she opened the door. He had been coming down the stairs as she entered, immediately skipping the last two steps and opening his arms for a hug. Sansa abandoned her suitcase, slammed the door shut with her hip and rushed into her father’s embrace.

“Sansa, is that you dear?” her mother called before the kitchen door opened and her mother was hurrying down the hallway to greet her daughter.

“Arya is already here, up in your room.”

“The boys?” Sansa asked as she was finally released.

 

“Robb and Jeyne should land into Glasgow any minute now and then they’re getting the train across. So, they’ll be another couple of hours. Bran is doing last minute Christmas shopping and Rickon is up in his room.”

Great, Sansa thought to herself. Her one singleton ally and he was being the stereotypical anti-social teenager. She had hoped that Rickon would at least buffer some of her mother’s match-making attempts. The last time Catelyn had tried to set her up, Rickon had commented that their mother should just start charging like match.com and then she would at least have something to show for her efforts.

It had gotten him grounded for a week but Sansa had been grateful for Catelyn had laid off the match-making for over a year.

“I know you’ll have to head back home before New Year for work,” Catelyn was saying as Sansa followed her through to the kitchen, lured by the promise of a cup of tea. She had missed Scottish water almost as much as she had missed her family. “But we’re having a small gathering here with family and friends, a sort of combined Christmas and New Year. It will be on the twenty-seventh as I knew you would all still be here.”

Sansa sighed softly, sliding into the chair in defeat. Her mother was up to her tricks again, she knew. But Sansa didn’t see much point in protesting anymore, finding it easier to just smile, nod and wait for the awkward introductions to be over.

***

She knew that her siblings weren't deliberately rubbing their successful love lives in her face, it wasn't like they were doing anything much different anyway. Robb and Jeyne had always been affectionate so she had been able to block their pet names and PDAs out for most of her stay. Bran never really did more than curl a hand around Meera's waist or press a kiss to her forehead but for some reason, the simple display seemed to annoy Sansa more than Robb opening snogging his wife in the corridor. And Arya was just excited about her engagement, Sansa couldn't grudge her for that.

She longed for a partner who would make her feel as desirable as Robb made Jeyne feel, as safe as Bran made Meera and as giddy as Gendry made Arya. She already believed that her mother would be unsuccessful in her matchmaking attempts again this year, but as her father came in to get the alcohol set up on the table, his words gave her even more doubt.

"She has her eye on a young editor this time," Ned chuckled, nudging her arm. Sansa rolled her eyes.

"Well, I suppose reporting and editing are linked," she sighed. 

"He used to live next door to your friend Beth," Ned continued. "And he apparently went to university with Robb" It was then that Sansa noticed his tone, making her pause.

"Dad," she said slowly, narrowing her eyes on him as he grinned.

"Robb says he got divorced last year."

"Mum really is running out of suitors then."

"You know, I think that this time she might have got it right."

Sansa shook her head, murmuring that he was a traitor as the doorbell started ringing. He pressed a kiss to her forehead before leaving to answer the door. She turned back to making the salad, hearing the doorbell go every so often and her mother rushing to open it. She was just re-arranging the bowls and plates on the table when her mother came hurrying through with a huge grin on her face.

"Sansa honey, there is somebody here I want you to meet."

_Here we go_

She dutifully began to follow her mother through to the living room, ignoring her mother tutting at her decision to go with comfort over style, The baggy jumper style dress and leggings smothered her curves and would give the wrong impression, Catelyn muttered. Sansa wanted to tell her that she didn't care about making an impression when it was never going to go anywhere anyway.

And then, she saw him. Or rather, the back of his head.

Still, even a rear view of him made her raise her eyebrows in interest. The long, dark curls would be perfect for running her fingers through she thought with a sly grin. And even under the jumper, she could tell her took care of himself. Even if it didn't become a relationship, she mused, she wouldn't say no to a bit of rough and tumble with this greek god come to life.

He turned around as her mother called out to him and Sansa barely managed to cover her laugh with an undignified snort.

He had a Christmas jumper on, a grumpy white dog glaring out at the world in the style of grumpy cat, the word 'Merry' sewed along the top in bold white letters, the word 'NO!' along the bottom. A hate for Christmas was definitely a tick in the 'not suitable' category for her.

"Jon, this is my daughter Sansa. She used to play with your cousin Beth, do you remember?"

"Um no, sorry," Jon said, looking at Sansa then and giving a polite incline of his head. "Hello Sansa."

"Really? She used to run naked across the lawn all the time!" Catelyn continued and Sansa spat her drink back in her glass, coughing and spluttering in the most undignified manner. Jon's face remained impassive as Catelyn continued. "And I am sure you kissed her once, when the girls forced you to play with them."

"Sorry," Jon said again, taking a sip from his bottle of beer. Catelyn patted Sansa's shoulder, giving her a wink as she moved away.

"Well," she began, chuckling nervously as Jon looked back at her. "I can't say I recall doing those things either."

Jon grunted. Sansa fiddled with the hem of her dress, feeling the awkwardness beginning to creep between them.

"So, you're an editor?" she asked, smiling enthusiastically.

"Yes, a political editor," Jon replied, taking another sip. She waited for him to say something else. He didn't.

"So...that must be difficult. Politicians and the parties are all the same aren't they?" she joked.

"Well no, not really," he stated dully. "And it is a rather a tedious argument, to be honest."

"Oh," Sansa replied dumbly, giving a nervous laugh. He said nothing, just continued sipping the beer. "Are you staying up here for New Year?"

"No, I have to get back to London for work."

Another sip.

"You?" he asked after a few seconds.

"No, I have a party to get to with my friends," she replied with a laugh. "I say I will cut back on the wine but, well, it never quite works."

Jon hummed, glancing around the room. "Excuse me."

She sighed, rubbing her forehead in exasperation. Well, she had expected it to be a failure hadn't she? Perhaps she should just accept the fate of dying alone with a bunch of cats.

She wandered through to the kitchen to refill her glass when she heard Robb's voice.

"I mean, she's perfect for you."

"No, thanks."

That was Jon's voice, she thought and as she opened the door she spotted them with their backs to her, eating crisps from the snack bowl. 

"And I know she's your sister but honestly, she is as far from my type as possible," Jon muttered. "Still partying in her late twenties, not paying attention to what is happening in the world."

The glass tumbled over and she bolted from the room before she could see if they had spotted her or not. She ran up to the room she shared with Arya, moving through to the en suite bathroom as she felt the tears start to fall.

This is the last straw, she thought. She was done having her mother set her up, she had to take this into her own hands now. Even a dullard like Jon Snow wasn't interested in her after all, things must be bad!

From now on, she vowed, she would not form romantic attachments to the following: alcoholics, workaholics, commitment phobics, peeping toms, megalomaniacs, emotional fuckwits or perverts.

And, she thought vaguely she would especially not form such an attachment with her boss who embodies all of those things: Theon Greyjoy.


End file.
